God is Love...

currently listening to: Justin Timberlake - Losing My Way.

Well I'm really ready to go to bed. But I wanted to quickly write before I head off for the night. Today was an alright day for me... worked from 11-7pm then went to band practice, which we didn't actually have. We all just sat there and prayed for one another and talked about worship and how worship comes from our heart and we are to worship in spirit and truth. And when our hearts aren't right before God then how are we to stand (sing, play piano, guitar) or sit (drum) when our hearts aren't right before our loving savior. This spoke to me a bit. I mean, sometimes there are days where i feel as if I am just so disconnected. But honestly, I don't know if its because of the Meds I am on, or if its because I have allowed myself get so wrapped up in this world and have lost my focus on my relationship with God. The thing for me is this...

I love God with my heart. I see Him through this time in my life looking down on me and saying to me that He loves me so much, no matter how depressed or sad that I may feel... He loves me through it all. He is a God who is so loving and wants nothing but the best for me. Even though - there are days that i just struggle so hard to have that relationship with Him. Or when there are days when I think He is looking down on me and shaking His head at me thinking of how messed up I am. The thing is - no matter what i am going through He is here. And right now, at this present time in my life, thats what i am clinging on to. Jesus is life. And He is someone who I know without a shaddow of a doubt that I can talk to at anytime of the day. When I'm happy or sad... He is there. He always will be. He loves me unconditionally, even when I feel as if I don't even love myself. Its a really comforting thought.

I'm tired. So off to bed I go. Will blog again soon.

Michelle

Comments

Jaclyn said…
Hey Michelle,

I think it is awesome that no matter how you seem to be feeling you still keep God in the picture. You still keep praising him
5:32 PM
mee-shell said…
hey thanks for the comment...

honestly its the only thing that i have to cling on to right now... so I have to trust believe and follow Jesus with my life... thanks for being an encouragement to me!

Bless you!
Michelle
9:01 PM
Jaclyn said…
sometimes that's the best place to be, I tend to get angry first, but after I have exhausted myself trying everything, I find that I need to just fall back and rest in God. Then I find out where real strength comes from.

I'll keep you in my prayers
3:10 PM
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