SHELLROCK!

Wednesday June 26th 2024. It seems to be in the quiet hours, when the world lies still that I find myself adrift, against my will. Tired bones, a heavy heart that weighs, in the darkness lost within this maze. Sleep eludes, a phantom in the night, thoughts like whispers, keepign me from flight. Echoes of the day, regrests that sting, memories and worries on silent wings. My eyes are heavy, yet they find no rest, a ceaseless cylce, an uninvited guest. The clcok tick son, mocking my despair, as I like awake in Midnights snare. Oh, to vanics, to slip away unseen, to find a refuge in a peaceful dream. To escape this world, if only for a while, to breathe, to pause, to find a fleeting smile. In the stillness, I yearn for release, A moments, reprive, a taste of peace. But dawn willc ome, and I must face the day.... with tired eyes, and thoughts will not sway.

I'm currently reading: Me and White Supremacy Workbook. So far this book is breaking my fucking heart... (sorry for the poor language, but I'm being honest & true with myself) Please be forwarned whoever reads this; this is going to be the most honest, heart breaking, deep thinking I've been in a really really really long time. I may swear, I may not swear, but this is being the absolute RAW me. This wont just be in this one, but in future ones to come. SO please excuse my language if it pops out time to time... this is the uncensored Michelle, the raw Michelle, the honest, deep true Michelle. So sit back, relax and join in with me as I share my most deeper inner thoughts/feelings and sharing from deep within' my heart & soul. SO where do I start... before reading this book, and before even really getting into anything else in my life, I really started to reminese about old times, how the OLD Michelle was, how I as always sad, depressed, how at one point, I ...

HELLO to the wonderful world of BLOGGING! I have not blooged on here since.... Thursday, August 27, 2015... WELL here we are 8 years later. What has Michelle been up to? WELL, work work and more work. oh and the odd Video game here and there when I can. (yeah I'm a bit of a nerd at heart still) here is a basic low down of what has taken place in the last 8 years. Worked a the Cariboo Brain Injury Society - they closed down, worked at a logging camp, it also closed down and now I have the amazing opportunity to work from home doing techinnical support. Im actually right in my element, which is pretty rad to say the least. Been doing this job for the last 6 years and love it. ALSO - we bought a house! have owned it now for I think 7 years give or take. what else... huge sad life events took place. lost my mother in law on September 29, 2013, then lost my father on September 7th 2014 and then lost my Father in law on February 25th 2015. ack what else... Just hon...

Ok, I have been so horrible at blogging. Life... well... been with Larry for 5 years now... have 2 dogs, a cat and loving it. Lots has happened over the past 2 years in it self. Lost the most amazing mother in law to breast cancer... lost my biological father whom I was able to reconnect with back in 2001 and build a relationship with again. He passed away almost a year ago this sept 7th. Lost the greatest father in law in feb. Life has thrown its curve balls to me. I have the greatest job in the world. (yes I am not exaggerating on that either - I really do!) I work as a community support worker and get to help out my clients to live a life that is possible for them to live independently. its been so great and rewarding. Never ever did I think I would be in the job that I am in. total people person.. hellooooo! heck yes! I have a huge heart still. I live a life of being selfless. I give more than I have ever before. and people tell me that all the time. I have been refle...

WOAH! are you kidding me... last time I blogged was back in 2008!!! this is CrAzInEsS!!! Ok so - hmmmm what has happended from 2008 until now? well I met the man of my dreams - long story short. we have been together now for 4years. amazing guy ever. he is my prince. i have worked at many jobs since 2008 - have lost a lot of friends between then and now. and have gained even better ones since. My dad passed away this year. still grieving him being gone, as it hasnt been a week yet... but still feels like it was yesterday that i said good by to him last. #heartbroken #sad #depressed apparently hash tags are the new in thing... #WOOOHOOO2014 I now work as a community support worker, and couldn't ask for a better job then what i have. i love my life #lifeisawesome anyways. thats a quick update. until next time... which will be soon... i hope... :)

It has been such a long time since I blogged last... so much has happend. 2007 brought a lot of joys, but yet a lot of heart ache and pain too... so much to update on! where in the world do I even begin!? Well I was working at Monsters Pizza - as dayshift supervisor. work was going really great, but one thing that i did realize that ust of been the hardest things ever, was being best friends with my boss really sucked... i ended up getting really sick, lost 15lbs in a month, was on all these medications to try and help me feel better. but nothing seemed to work. things just ended up getting worse. i gave my 2 weeks notice back in november 2007. got a job which was better pay better hours, everything was just better about it. and i realized that once i let monsters pizza to go work at the government building (janitorial work) everything lifted from me, the stress, the weight had started to slowly come back, my appatite, my migraine headaches were less often. which mind you the dr was ve...

I bet you are wondering what in the world has Michelle been up to... LOTS! Life has been crazy busy for me. Work is getting busy now, totally starting to pick up, not too sure yet if thats a good thing or not especially since my boss is going away next week for a week to sask. for holidays and is leaving me in charge while she is away... SO I have been learning a lot over these past few weeks, doing more around the store more then I usually already do, heading in the store at 8am on Monday (my day off) and on Thursday to learn how to recieve the food shipment... learning how to manage the whole store on my own. So you can imagine how stressful this has been for me, considering my boss has never left the province before since I have started working at monsters pizza over a year ago. She has gone to Kamloops and Vancouver - but never that far away, so she is a bit stressed about leaving, and I'm heaps stressed that she is going to be so far away considering when she was closer it was...