my very random thoughts
Hey Everyone - I'm not too sure how many people will read my blog now - but thats ok! God has been really good to me these past few days - He is so gracious compassionate. And even though a few things have happend over these past few days to feel a bit discouraged in the fight - God held me up. He helped me to push through the discouragement and to keep my eyes set on Him.
I am so blessed and thankful for everything that God has given me. For my life - for every single breath that I take. The deep breaths - the sorrow that I sometimes feel in my heart - The tears that I sometimes cry - even sometimes when things are just going so horrible and I can't even find the words to really express how I'm feeling - God is there. He blesses me through it all...
Right now I'm really praying and focusing my eyes on Jesus - and working through some things in my life and mostly in my heart - so that I can focus more on Him and focus on the relationship that I have with Him. Its tough sometimes though - sometimes its really tough - but I just gotta pull through.
I'm currenly working through this peice of paper that has a whole pile of questions on it... questions that aren't just surface ones but more of the gotta dig deep down type of questions - which by the way - I sometimes don't like those kind of questions but sometimes they are really good to be asked.
I am realzing more things in my life that are unpleasing to God - but yet at the same time I'm finding more things that are pleasing. My heart is really wanting to be able to bring Joy to God and to be all that I can be for Him.
I know - and some of you who are reading this may know - that over these past few months have been tough for me - spiritually - emotionally - physically. its just been tough - But as its been tough - God has been refining me... as I got to the bottom of the Vally to a point where I didn't care anymore - thinking of so many negitive things - thinking of even walking away from God - He spoke clearly to me. Just as I even prayed that He would. He is slowly bringing me out of the valley. It feels good.
I have been spending these past few days - writting - and playing on my guitar. I have been trying to just let God lead me to a different place of worship - not just in every day life but also in my personal time with Him. I found myself last night playing my guitar in my room - I was sitting on my bed with it - my cat was running all around me I just had my chin resting on the top of the guitar with my eyes closed as I just plucked away on it. There wasn't anything specific that I was playing - but as I played I felt a calmness come over me. I haven't felt that for a while... it felt really amazing. And after a bit I noticed that my cat was no longer running around but was right on my lap starting to doze off... which was great because she has been keeping me up late at night - she just wants to play all the time... she is just so adorable.
So tonight - I'm plannning on reading - praying - and playing my guitar a bit before I go to bed. Infact I should probably be in bed right now - But I jsut got home from work and its 12:41am... ah well - I don't work until tomorrow night again - so I can sleep in if need be. :)
Also - I am sorry for my lack of blogging - and if things get a bit personal - and stuff I'm sorry - but I just really feel that its best to just share what on your heart and mind... My thoughts are important - yet are my feelings. And I know that what I write - even though sometimes it may not make any sense at all - God knows my heart. And I just also want to be able to share my heart with you too (whoever who reads this)
Blessings to you! and I promise I will try and post more often...
Michelle :)
I am so blessed and thankful for everything that God has given me. For my life - for every single breath that I take. The deep breaths - the sorrow that I sometimes feel in my heart - The tears that I sometimes cry - even sometimes when things are just going so horrible and I can't even find the words to really express how I'm feeling - God is there. He blesses me through it all...
Right now I'm really praying and focusing my eyes on Jesus - and working through some things in my life and mostly in my heart - so that I can focus more on Him and focus on the relationship that I have with Him. Its tough sometimes though - sometimes its really tough - but I just gotta pull through.
I'm currenly working through this peice of paper that has a whole pile of questions on it... questions that aren't just surface ones but more of the gotta dig deep down type of questions - which by the way - I sometimes don't like those kind of questions but sometimes they are really good to be asked.
I am realzing more things in my life that are unpleasing to God - but yet at the same time I'm finding more things that are pleasing. My heart is really wanting to be able to bring Joy to God and to be all that I can be for Him.
I know - and some of you who are reading this may know - that over these past few months have been tough for me - spiritually - emotionally - physically. its just been tough - But as its been tough - God has been refining me... as I got to the bottom of the Vally to a point where I didn't care anymore - thinking of so many negitive things - thinking of even walking away from God - He spoke clearly to me. Just as I even prayed that He would. He is slowly bringing me out of the valley. It feels good.
I have been spending these past few days - writting - and playing on my guitar. I have been trying to just let God lead me to a different place of worship - not just in every day life but also in my personal time with Him. I found myself last night playing my guitar in my room - I was sitting on my bed with it - my cat was running all around me I just had my chin resting on the top of the guitar with my eyes closed as I just plucked away on it. There wasn't anything specific that I was playing - but as I played I felt a calmness come over me. I haven't felt that for a while... it felt really amazing. And after a bit I noticed that my cat was no longer running around but was right on my lap starting to doze off... which was great because she has been keeping me up late at night - she just wants to play all the time... she is just so adorable.
So tonight - I'm plannning on reading - praying - and playing my guitar a bit before I go to bed. Infact I should probably be in bed right now - But I jsut got home from work and its 12:41am... ah well - I don't work until tomorrow night again - so I can sleep in if need be. :)
Also - I am sorry for my lack of blogging - and if things get a bit personal - and stuff I'm sorry - but I just really feel that its best to just share what on your heart and mind... My thoughts are important - yet are my feelings. And I know that what I write - even though sometimes it may not make any sense at all - God knows my heart. And I just also want to be able to share my heart with you too (whoever who reads this)
Blessings to you! and I promise I will try and post more often...
Michelle :)
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